End of Year

I’ve been living in this world for 22 years

I’ve been in love with a same person for 9 years now

And I’ve been unable to fallin’ love with someone else, the same way as I did to him, for 9 years either

I treasure that love the most, the love who took everything, everything from my adolescent day and my ability to greatly love someone. 

I know I tell story about him too much, but he’s the reason  I found my way to literature world. If I ain’t meeting him, If my fate turns cold on me and makes our meeting slip in time, I dont think I’ll ever gonna be able to write, or become a writer. 

Well, I must say that everything has it’s reason.

And I know my reason to write is because of my never-ending love for him.

Some of you who read this will laugh, and your cynical lips will spill the words, “Oh, this was happened to every teenage girl in her fourteen. For God Sake, you’re twenty-two!”

I am twenty-two, So what? If I am, still waiting for a prince on a white horse, will that harm you? Will that leave a scar to your reality as it did to mine? 

Despite of what happened to me, I never give up. My question is “Why do I have to given up that thought? Because people told me to grow up and forget?”

I do become a grown-up and I always tend to forget things easily.

 But that leaves me nothing than my desire to once again sink into his brown eyes, knowing he’s fine and alive, that we both standing under the same sun and breath the same air. I know we can’t go back to who we used to be, when pouring rain trapped us together in the same telephone box. Two innocent kids, unprepared for their first love.

What did I miss? Myself at that time or the memory of him?

Well, this will be my last post for 2013. My mood is a bit down lately, but I still hope for everyone’s  happiness next year, too. Just smile, that heals more than any medicine. 

So .. Will I be able to meet him, once again, next year? How do you think, guys?

Another Mistaken Love

I shouldn't do this

I shouldn't fallin' in love with you

Everyone can see through me, a thing that burn in my eyes when I see you, everyone can see it clearly, like bright sun in the white sky, it's so blinding ..

I hate to say that Im already fall into the dark pit and Im afraid I'll pull you down with me 

Really I shouldn't do this, This growing feeling, this horrible feeling

I couldn't believe this is what people called such an enchanting feeling

'Cause I feel like a sinner just to know I had this feeling in me

Dont look at me with that kind of gaze, I might drop on my knees and start to cry

Dont talk to me with that caring voices, I might break into pieces when I finally have to say goodbye

From the start, I've been fallin' in love with a wrong guy

Everytime I had the chance to escape and run, I ignore it like I didn't see it

Im afraid if I lose you now, I cant stand tomorrow's reality, that you will not be here with me

Well, everyone knows we were bounded by love, like we've been tangled up because it meant to be

But, I know now that fate is just cold and cruel reality that we have to accept happily

Dont, dont do that, dont stay still beside me like this

I might not let you go forever

Dont, just dont, dont show that you love me

I might not let you be yesterdays history

Now you can walk away and I will turn my back against you too

This feelings scream inside me, begging not to let you go

I hold my own hands tight, walk into another life, another love

Then suddenly all the sad tears I've been keep in all this time melted with the snow, slowly falls into my heart ..

Oooooold-Friends

Adelehorine.com.au

I had this beautiful and long friendship with my very dear-friend that I love so much, her name is Lia Arista. We met when we were 13th years old, a very young age with a very grown body and heart. She's a charming girl whose living her life as a good girl to her mother and a very bright lovers for her past and current boyfriend.

I must say, We had this 10 years best-friend relationship, of course with so much obstacle and trouble. We deliberately entangled in so much misunderstanding and stuffs. 

Even at some time in the past, I've loved the man she used to love, too. But she never know this, until this day, maybe, If she read this post. 

But I know even when she knows, She'll be laugh and pat my back, say something like, "Well, he's not a good guy and Im happy Im the one who ended up with him, not you. You deserve better."

The same sentences I'll spill it out of my mouth if something like that happened to me too. 

We love each other, my best-friend and me.

And we dont know why fate leads us to this looooooong friendship. But this friendship between me and her had helped me in so many ways to keep moving forward despite what happened at the moment. 

She gives me courage and strength I needed and she never try to teach me or judge me. She believe that Im strong enough to face the truth by myself and that I will found my own ways to get out of the trouble. That way, even though we're far, we can still help each other with that trust only. 

I never see her as someone I want her to be.

I see her as herself. 

And she sees me as myself too.

And what makes us as happy as to be loved because of the way we are?

  

 

An Adult

You dont have any choices, if you want to live as an adult.

You have to fool yourselves. You have to lie to your consciousness. You have to act like your life is fine and so everything’s gonna be fine. Tomorrow is a new day.

And it’s so hard.

To be able to lie to your heart is so hard.

Because at that deepest part of you, lie won’t get through. Only truth will remains, safe and sound.

And I am still learning on how to be a much more, better person than I am right now.

And I’ll still learn until the day I die.

Born as The Black Sheep

I was born as the black sheep of my family

-the black sheep who turns all the white sheep mad and dive them into madness. My own sister told me this, by her own mouth and note this, she’s not drunk at the moment.

I live as a wrecked, sadistic yet eccentric person

-you know that sometimes whats really going on in your mind, turns out very different on the outside

I know when Im younger, my parents doubt that I’ll ever gonna be a good adult

-and what they mean by being an adult? Always accept what they’re being told?

I am the very bad example and very bad reality for my family

-surely, I am a very bad person, who turns bad because people pointed their hands at me and says that I am bad. Im just fulfilling their wishes. Is that wrong?

I laughed when people says that my ego is bigger than any tower in the world

-why wouldn’t I? When I am the one who’ll always stain their face with black-ink, Why wouldn’t I live with my big ego? When the truth is, they never gonna ask me, whats really happened in my life and how I feel about that!

 I cried so hard when I see myself talking like that

-the truth is too hard to handle for all of us. I know that even my parents didn’t educated me well, in so many aspects in life, but my brother and sister grow very well ; unlike me, and so I came to a conclusion that maybe I am a mistakes that happened, maybe once, to someone’s perfect life.   

I don’t see my family as a reflection of me, they’re just a stranger that happens to have me came into life and then be responsible to feed me.

-I was raised as a cute little doll, a child that lives with so many loves and so many lies. I wonder if it’s just me, or am I just an unintended existence that makes my family shook into destruction? Is it me? Is it this empty doll? This empty soul?

Someone once said to me,

“Why would you feel that you’re a really bad person? What makes you think like that?”

And I cry so hard after that. I cry. And cry.

G(r)ayish

In this very little world, I met with someone I know for a long time in some Department Store

He’s huggin’ a very pretty boy, all red from head-to-toe, I just thought that maybe all the issue from last time is true, after all.

Maybe my very-dear friend really is a gay.

I’ve known him for quiet a time, until sometimes we didn’t have to say anything and just look in each other eyes to communicate. He had this really tall and big bones, a pale-white skin with a brown hair – we go to the same salon every month – and a very bright eyes, that shines like a puppy. He’s also a hardcore fan of the same rock musicians as me, a hot leader from 90’s rock band.

Never cross my mind that all the rumour I’ve been heard of is the truth.

What? Do I sound like I’ve been judging him? No, because I’m not, at all.

I’ve always support whatever a human can be. A killer. A psychotic. A saint. A buddhist. A moslem. A whatever-personality-you-might-be. And even, A gay.

“Why? Why?”

Because some gay-people will not hurt you. It’s just when they were about to born, they pull a very bad –luck lottery from the angels. It’s just life. Sometimes it’s so bent and sometimes it’s so stiff and straight.

They’re just humans. And Im not talking about my religions or anything, Im talking about how I still love and dear him so much, despite all of that. I dont think about how it is a very taboo things in our very-narrow-minded society, because when you think too much, you cant feel any happiness in life.

I just think about how much courage he need and how much tears he had to spill because of that.

Because he’s not on the side of black nor white.

He’s on a grey side. Right in between.

Can you .. imagine how it feels like?

Soul for Artworks

When I draw, I feel like my soul has been stolen away from me. My drawing becomes alive while I’ve lost a piece of my own life.

A price that I have to pay for the sake of beautiful and edgy art is what?

Myself.

A price that you have to pay for the sake of your art is what?

I dont think you know that answer.

Your hands only copying whats left in this world.

My hands gives it life and soul. Makes it walk, run and dance. Makes it as sad as a broken-heart lovers. Makes it as rosy as blooming cherry tree. Makes it as hearty as a human can be.

I give it a piece of me. My sadness. My happy memories. My distorted minds.

You can feel it, touch it with your eyes and drunk into the madness

You feel me,

My world,

Myself.

But then I lost myself, I became so empty and hollow, I lost everything I have,

Just to found it again in a different time and place.

Because thats the price I have to pay.

Whats yours?

Chassinner

You’ve been chained down by your own sin, You cant go far

Wherever you go ..

You’ve been chained down by your own sin, You cant go far

Wherever ..

You’ve been chained down by your own sin

You cant go far

Where? Where will you go?

Because you’ve been chained down by your own sin

You cant go far

You cant live

You cant run

Wherever you go

You’ve been chased down by your own sin

“Im here. Next to you. Hug you tightly. Won’t let you go.”

Blinding White Light

We’ll trying to swept this mess right away. We’ll called this a strange meeting, when all the turn sign shut down all of a sudden, we only have each other in the blink of an eye

Yes, I guess, this is it

Who am I? Who are you? We’ll clean this mess. This mess in our life and our head.

Maybe I’m a thief, Maybe I’m a sinner, Maybe I’m a really bad example for you

But is it true that all the rough time makes our heart frozen, unable to feel anything anymore? Because when the sun is rise, you’re still here, hold me tight. Don’t you afraid of losing your insanity while maintaning all the logic in our life? There’s no tomorrow. We’ll just live here, right here, right now. “What is future?” You asked me with your low tone voice.

“Nothing. Just another grey and cloudy day.” I chose that words as my answer.

 “Then why we still live? When theres no differences in living and dying. We live this life just to die. Just to be sand and dust. Forgotten and rotten.” You said. Pinch something in my deep-deep heart.

Forgotten. And rotten.

The only thing that give light into my heart is your existence. Your smiling face. Your bluish eyes. I dont even imagine how things are when you’re not here. When at last, your warm and sturdy hands no longer holding me.

You sat by the window, put your hands against the sun, something that I really loved. Seems like all the morning light absorbed into your big palm, saturated all my world in this bright and blinding white light. For a second, I feel like crying. Like, really cry my heart out. Shout all this tired and distorted minds. Will I really be able to letting you go? Will I really be able to live after you’re gone?

Your eyes closed.

All this screaming voice inside my head tellin’ me something. Something really bothering.

“Make him yours. You know how to make him yours for a lifetime.”

I lift my hands up.

Your shoulder seems like a warm and puffy cake.

You looked at me in the eye. Smiling. I take it as a ‘yes’.

His surprised eyes and face is the only thing I remember when my hands pushed him down the window, at the same time when all the white light in my world falls while all the rough memories stays. 

So then I make him mine. For a lifetime. 

KILL THEM

I want to write something in his forehead,

"ASSHOLE."   

A very important steps to an enormous idea

Kebanyakan klien menganggap desainer grafis adalah seorang penyihir yang bisa memunculkan ide-ide kreatif secara seketika, hanya dengan mengayunkan tongkat ajaib – atau dalam hal ini menggerakkan mouse dan memencet tombol-tombol kombinasi di keyboard. Padahal, sebagai seorang desainer grafis, kita tahu bahwa, kenyataannya justru sebaliknya.

Menciptakan sebuah ide desain yang orisinil sama sekali bukan sihir yang bisa terjadi dalam hitungan detik. Proses ini mencakup seluruh prosedur menuangkan ide kreatif yang bersumber dari otak desainer ke dalam hasil karya akhirnya.

Nah, hal paling sulit bagi seorang desainer grafis adalah menjelaskan proses kreatifnya di hadapan klien atau manajer proyek, sehingga mereka bisa memahami betapa sulit dan menantangnya profesi sebagai seorang desainer grafis. Tapi, tenang saja. Kali ini, saya akan membantu menyampaikan apa yang sribuddies mungkin tak bisa sampaikan kepada klien. Ya, inilah enam tahap penting dalam mengembangkan ide kreatif yang pastinya pernah dilalui oleh Anda, dan semua desainer grafik lainnya.

Belajar

Pembentukan ide desain dimulai dengan pembelajaran dan pemahaman yang mendalam tentang dasar-dasar desain yang ingin sribuddies ciptakan. Pemikiran kreatif Anda harus didukung oleh dasar pengetahuan dan kebijaksanaan yang baik mengenai tren dan perkembangan desain. Meskipun ini bukan kondisi yang mutlak diperlukan untuk mencapai kreativitas, tetapi dengan latar belakang yang kuat dari lapangan, Anda akan memiliki gambaran bagaimana mengaplikasikan ide-ide kreatif Anda ke dalam bentuk nyata.

Ikuti Pelatihan

Pelatihan sangat penting untuk mempelajari bagaimana melakukan sesuatu dengan benar. Terlepas dari fakta bahwa sribuddies merancang dengan tangannya sendiri atau dengan menggunakan beberapa perangkat lunak desain, Anda harus sepenuhnya terlatih dalam mengoperasikan alat-alat, sehingga tidak mengalami hambatan dalam proses kreatif untuk menghasilkan desain logo. Sebagai seorang desainer grafis, pelatihan sangat penting dalam efektif untuk menyelesaikan proyek desain Anda secara efektif.

Investigasi

Bahkan sebelum sribuddies mulai membayangkan sebuah ide, sribuddies harus memperoleh informasi yang cukup mengenai client, termasuk bidang usahanya, jasa yang ditawarkannya, karakter perusahaannya, dan lainnya. Kesalahan seorang desainer grafis yang terburuk adalah, langsung melompat ke tahap merancang, karena sebenarnya tahap investigasi ini sangat penting untuk menghasilkan ide-ide yang faktual dan relevan. Dalam sebagian besar kasus, Anda akan mendapatkan informasi ini dari client saat ia menjelaskan desainer yang ia inginkan. Tetapi, jika client tidak memberikan informasi yang cukup, maka beban jatuh ke pundak sang desainer sendiri untuk melakukan penyelidikan penuh mengenai hal-hal yang relevan yang dibutuhkan dalam merancang sebuah desain.

Pencerahan

Setelah pikiran Anda terpenuhi dengan data dan informasi yang cukup dan yang berkaitan dengan subjek, sekarang saatnya Anda akan menghadapi fase pencerahan di mana sebuah gagasan kreatif muncul muncul di kepala Anda, yang dapat Anda manfaatkan untuk melengkapi rancangan desain. Pada tahap ini, ide itu tidak sepenuhnya menetas dan perlu “dierami” agar lebih matang. Sebaiknya, Anda mulai mencatat hal-hal kecil dan potongan-potongan pikiran yang mulai bermunculan, agar kemudian dapat disatukan menjadi sebuah rancangan yang utuh.

Ideasi

Setelah melalui serangkaian fase yang berat, desainer grafis akhirnya sampai juga di tahap awal penghasilan ide kreatif. Sebut saja tahap ini ideasi (Ide kreatif+ Generasi). Di sini, Anda dapat mulai menyaring potongan-potongan kecil kreativitas yang telah sribuddies peroleh pada tahap sebelumnya, dan mengubahnya menjadi sebuah ide desain grafis yang tepat. Proses ini melibatkan kemampuan menganalisa rancangan-rancangan yang mungkin menarik untuk dikerjakan, dan menghilangkannya satu per satu, sampai didapat sebuah ide kreatif yang terbaik.

Eksekusi

Tentu saja, proses kreatif tidak selesai sampai di situ. Masih ada satu tahapan lagi yang sangat krusial dan menentukan hasil akhir dari seluruh fase yang telah Anda lewati. Apalagi kalau bukan eksekusi.

Salah satu kesalahpahaman umum dalam dunia desain grafis adalah bahwa, proses kreatif berakhir saat sebuah ide brilian tercetus. Padahal, tanpa pelaksanaan yang tepat, ide sejenius apapun akan gagal dan kerja keras sribuddies akan sia-sia. Makanya, fase eksekusi ini harus dijalankan dengan sangat seksama.

Fase ini melibatkan proses mengubah sketsa ke dalam format digital, menambahkan warna dan efek, serta menguji hasil akhir apabila diaplikasikan ke dalam beberapa media. Dan, setelah mendapat persetujuan akhir dari klien, maka barulah proses desain kreatif dapat dianggap selesai.

http://achmadyanu.com/?p=50

A big change for a small business

Mendirikan sebuah bisnis tidak terkecuali bisnis kecil memerlukan lebih dari sekedar komitmen dan kesungguhan. Bisnis yang baik harus ditopang dari kekuatan manajemen, keunggulan produk yang ditawarkan sekaligus keterlibatan kreatifitas dan inovasi baik dari aspek produk ataupun tata kelola perusahaan pada umumnya. Bisnis kecil dalam menghadapi persaingan pasar yang ketat dewasa ini harus mampu menciptakan berbagai strategi kreatif dalam memasarkan produk serta menjaga kualitasnya.

Bisnis kecil harus memiliki kemampuan beradaptasi yang tinggi agar dapat menerapkan dan mengantisipasi perubahan-perubahan yang harus dilakukan untuk mengembangkan bisnis. Perubahan tersebut diharapkan mampu menggiring bisnis yang dibangun untuk mencapai keberhasilan yang lebih tinggi. Jika sebuah perusahaan khususnya yang berskala kecil tidak dapat melakukan perubahan apa-apa baik dari aspek produk ataupun dari aspek pemasaran secara keseluruhan akan mudah mengalami kegagalan. Terdapat beberapa hal untuk bisnis kecil yang dapat membuat perubahan besar.

Target

Untuk bisnis kecil sebaiknya seorang pebisnis mulai memfokuskan diri pada target pasar. Sebuah perusahaan kecil akan dirasa sangat sulit bila diharuskan mampu melayani berbagai permintaan pasar. Dengan keterbatasan itulah, maka target menjadi penting untuk dipikirkan. Produk atau jasa dari sebuah bisnis kecil bukan untuk semua orang sehingga bisnis dalam skala kecil harus mulai memfokuskan diri pada segala yang bisa menjadi spesialisasinya

Be Different

Dengan persaingan yang semakin ketat saat ini, sebuah bisnis kecil harus mampu menonjol di pasar agar dapat setidaknya dilirik oleh pelanggan. Perhatian pelanggan inilah yang menjadi fokus utama sebuah bisnis kecil yang menjadi start up dalam persaingan pasar yang sangat ketat. segala kemajuan teknologi yang ada saat ini, keunikan sebuah produk atau jasa dapat ditiru dengan sangat mudah, sehingga perusahaan harus mampu beradaptasi dengan segala perubahan yang ada.

Be Consistent

Konsistensi merupakan factor utama yang dapat mewujudkan kesuksesan sebuah perusahaan walaupun dalam skala yang kecil. Apabila perusahaan tidak memiliki konsistensi sebelumnya, maka perusahaan dalam skala yang kecil harus berubah dengan mengedepankan konsistensi untuk menunjukkan jati diri yang sebenarnya dalam perusahaan.

Fast and Reliable

Sebuah bisnis yang berupaya mengejar kesuksesan yang maksimal harus sangat memperhatikan waktu. Time management dalam menjalankan bisnis walaupun pada skala yang kecil harus dapat dikelola dengan baik sehingga operasi bisnis secara keseluruhan dapat berjalan dengan baik dan bisa meningkatkan kepuasan tidak hanya dari pelanggan namun juga karyawan yang terlibat dalam proses bisnis walaupun dalam skala yang kecil.

Care and Humble

Hubungan baik dengan pelanggan dan karyawan sangat penting untuk dijaga oleh perusahaan manapun tidak terkecuali dari bisnis skala kecil. Penghargaan yang setinggi-tingginya terhadap pelanggan dan karyawan akan menciptakan kesan terjadinya hubungan timbal balik antara perusahaan dengan pelanggan dan karyawan. Hubungan strategis inilah yang dapat memperkuat posisi perusahaan dalam persaingan pasar yang sangat ketat.

http://achmadyanu.com/?p=46

Let Loose Your Creative Team

Perusahaan yang mampu bertahan dalam persaingan pasar yang ketat selain harus memiliki kualitas produk yang bagus, juga harus mempunyai tim kerja yang solid. Untuk menemukan kembali genius kreatif, terdapat sejumlah cara untuk mematahkan pola-pola yang tidak produktif dan menciptakan lingkungan yang tidak hanya menyehatkan namun juga mampu mempercepat terciptanya kreatifitas. Terdapat tiga metode non-tradisional yang dapat direkomendasikan sebagai berikut:

Bermain dengan tanah liat.

Permainan ini mungkin terdengar aneh bagi orang dewasa dan mungkin terdapat beberapa ketidaknyamanan bahkan penolakan ketika kegiatan ini dilakukan. Fungsi dari permainan ini sebenarnya adalah lebih bersifat ice breaking untuk memecah penat dalam pekerjaan kantor.

Rencanakan idle time.

Rencanakan sebagian waktu dalam seminggu untuk benar-benar terbebas dari rutinitas yang ada. Pergi untuk berjalan-jalan. Duduk dan berpikir. Menikmati waktu tenang. Dengan memberikan waktu agar otak beristirahat dari serangan rutinitas dan terlibat dalam kegiatan yang menenangkan dan inspiratif, sehingga pada akhirnya bisa kembali kerja dengan pikiran yang tenang.

Berkarya seni

Membuat seni adalah cara yang efektif untuk membuka jalur kreatif. Seperti berbagai produk inovatif yang laris di pasaran tercipta dari coretan-coretan desainer dengan pemikiran yang sangat leluasa untuk mendapatkan ide segar.

http://achmadyanu.com/?p=246

Art Nouveau, the beauty of floral image

Art Noveau adalah sebuah aliran seni yang memiliki gaya dekoratif tumbuhan (flora) yang liuk-liuk. Aliran ini muncul pertama kali muncul di Eropa dan Amerika pada tahun 1819 hingga menjelang perang dunia pertama (1914). Art Noveau berasal dari sebuah toko di Paris yang dibuka tahun 1895 oleh Stegfried Bing. Di Eropa aliran ini menggunakan beberapa nama, diantaranya: Jugendstill (Jerman), Vinna Secession (Austria), Stile Liberty (Italia), Modernista (Spanyol) dan Glassgow School (Inggris) seperti yang telah disebutkan di atas.

Hal tersebut di atas, juga dijelaskan dalam web http://www.artchive.com/ artchive/ art_nouveau.html., yaitu “An international style of decoration and architecture which developed in the 1880s and 1890s. The name derives from the Maison de l’Art Nouveau, an interior design gallery opened in Paris in 1896, but in fact the movement had different names throughout Europe. In Germany it was known as ‘Jugendstil’, from the magazine Diejugend (Youth) published from 1896; in Italy ‘Stile Liberty’ (after the London store, Liberty Style) or ‘Floreale’; in Spain ‘Modernista’, in Austria ‘Sezessionstil’ and, paradoxically, in France the English term ‘Modern Style’ was often used, emphasizing the English origins of the movement.

Pada masa gerakan Art Nouveau, ada seorang tokoh bernama Louis Sullivan (1856-1924) melontarkan slogannya “Form Follows Function” yang mengandung maksud bahwa semua bentuk harus ada fungsinya dan tahun 1897 Adolf Loos dengan kata-katanya “makin rendah tingkat budaya suatu bangsa, makin meriahlah ornamentasinya”. Karena itu di kemudian hari seni dan arsitektur menjadi satu dalam madzab Bauhaus, maka baik seni lukis maupun seni bangunan dalam naungannya berusaha untuk menjadi sesederhana mungkin (Soedarso SP, 1990: 68).

Gerakan Art Nouveau muncul pada awal abad 20 di negara-negara Eropa seperti Belanda, Belgia dan Jerman. Gerakan Art Nouveau tidak seperti Art & Craft yang memusuhi mesin, gerakan ini lebih merupakan seni terapan pada awalnya. Wujud desainnya seperti sejenis flora aneh atau organisme yang hidup. Berupa bentuk-bentuk yang mengalun, meliuk, berdenyut, menggeliat dan sebagainya, yang kadang tidak menggambarkan apapun. Bentuk bangunannya memperlihatkan keterpaduan antara hiasan dan struktur, strukturnya sendiri terkesan dekoratif. http://www.geocities.com/ sta5_ar530/data/01renaisanspurna.htm.

Nilai lebih yang dimiliki Art Nouveau adalah keinginan untuk menerima mesin (sehingga antisipasi kuantitas produksi menjadi teratasi) serta menerima craft sebagai bagian pula. Hanya saja, setiap gerakan biasanya memiliki kekurangan, dan demikian pula halnya dengan Art Nouveau. Salah satunya adalah pergesekan antara sisi estetika dengan fungsionalitas, terutama berkaitan dengan bahan yang digunakan (semacam structure vs decoration). Misalnya penggunaan bahan-bahan yang terbuat dari baja yang baik secara struktur tetapi menyulitkan secara dekorasi, terutama terkait dengan masalah besarnya dana yang harus dikeluarkan (secara sederhana: ignoring the characters of element). Terkadang sebuah bentuk arsitektur yang begitu indah tetapi ditempatkan pada lokasi yang tidak semestinya, seperti lampu dengan ornamen yang luar biasa detil dan indah, tetapi ditempatkan pada sebuah stasiun yang super sibuk sehingga tidak bisa dinikmati oleh pengguna stasiun tersebut (http://www. veetra.com/index.php? option=com_content&task=view&id=50&Itemid=71& PHPSESSID=f906bd971).

Art Nouveau mempengaruhi lahirnya sekolah desain Bauhaus di Jerman pada tahun 1919. Sehingga tercapainya keserasian dan kesinambungan ke arah kemajuan dan modernisasi mebel. Di Indonesia pengaruh ini dapat dilihat pada perbedaan desain kursi ketua MPR dan wakil ketuanya. Dimana kursi ketua MPR didesain lebih berwibawa dibandingkan para wakil ketuanya. Begitu juga Presiden dan Wakil Presiden pun tidak boleh menyaingi kewibawaan kursi ketua MPR. Tetapi dalam kedudukannya harus didesain paling berwibawa diantara kursi-kursi lain dalam struktur pemerintahan.

Disamping itu Art Nouveau juga berpengaruh terhadap grafis, yaitu dapat dilihat pada logo perusahaan transportasi terbesar di Amerika pada tahun 1868. Yang tercermin dari bentuk logo Union Pacific yang berupa tameng dengan pola garis-garis dengan warna merah biru yang sangat khas Amerika. Pada proses evolusi desain logonya mengalami perubahan sebanyak 27 kali dan pada dasarnya, proses perubahan logo sebanyak itu dapat dibagi dalam beberapa fase perubahan, sesuai dengan keadaan zaman dan gaya desain yang dipergunakan.

Ciri-ciri desain Art Nouveau adalah merupakan perkembangan desain tradisional-modern, diantaranya merupakan pergantian mebel tradisional oleh mesin dan adanya motif tumbuh-tumbuhan sebagai aspek dekorasi atau hiasannya.

http://achmadyanu.com/?p=264

Pressure

Been a while..

I've been in this horrible feelings for a while.

"When will you stop acting all straight and sound?"

"What will happen when your dream is the one thats killing you right now?"

"What if it's all just an empty promises?"

"What if the world you believe in right now is so fake until you couldn't tell it is fake?" 

"You're mess up."

"Do you .. know it?"

I do! For god sake, I do know!

I do know that I'm in such a mess and no one will help me except myself!

And what will those questions do for me? Nothing. Im still left alone without answer. Then what should I do? Cry? Blaming myself? Why would I do that?

I know I've gotta fix it as soon as possible or there will be nothing left except pain and desperation.

I just need time. Let me do it my ways. 

We all walk in the same darkness,

We just deal with it in different ways.

You gotta accept it. Im never gonna be your light and you'll never gonna be my light..

Someone Ask Me This

Someone ask me ..

"Hey, is that okay to post your private life in the net? 
What will happened when someone used it to attack you? You know, theres so many bad people out there. You take too much risk."

And my answer is,

"Oh, you fool! It's internet! Of course I filtered and makes it a little bit more dramatic, just like what Hollywood does when they remake some old movie!"

Well, it's true. We all did it.
The honest one nod their head and some others close this post immediately. Thats okay.

We all know the truth. :)

Cheating

The only words that we all can say when it comes to "cheating someone" is "sorry", but it didn't heal anything much, their heart still break apart. It's just running through their vein into something unreal. Just a surrealism in the middle of chaos night.

Well, one tears that spill down in his/her cheek when we did cheat him/her is a million guilty feeling and a one thousand nights prayer to fix it up.

Me? Of course I did it. We all did it, at least once. Or maybe it's just my cynical thoughts.

My story is not fancy at all, it's just a dumb and foolish story.
I was so young at that moment, many guy come and goes, many love pass me by, many stories happened in between and much more tears in addition of it.
He is a couple years older than me, a charismatic and open-hearted guy, who live his lives as a guy who believe that love only comes when we forget what it feels like to be lonely.

 I am, in love, madly in love with him.
And I dont feel any loneliness at all, at that time.

And yes, I have to say that he's a good actor, and good actor should be awarded with good trophy, right?
That trophy I threw at him when all his act found out by me is a trophy that I wish never exist in my heart. It's hatred. A big hatred.
Man that I love so much for some time, is a liar. That reality ripped my heart and it feels so lonely, suddenly. I left with insanity in chaos and my life in danger of turning into something very bad and black, like a dirty mud.

My way of healing is to do the same thing as him. Cheating around with somebody else's guys.
Sounds funny?
I'll tell you whats the real funny thing is, when you cheat with somebody's boyfriend and it turned out that their girlfriend is cheating with your college friends who always trying to seduce you. Thats funny. For me.
But I didn't laugh at all. I just felt like a douche-bag. A trash thats waiting to ended up in a garbage world.

That period of healing took me a year and a half, a very long time to wake up and push myself to move forward and left it all behind. Those days are gone. It'll never be back, I said to myself.

So I chose my freedom. Free of busy thinking about someone else's lovers and free from the wicked thoughts about my former boyfriend who lives his life well like he never did any bad things.
Maybe I'm just jealous. Maybe I just love him too much.
Maybe I just young and innocent.

But those days are gone, once again.
And it will never be back.

Blissful Day

zazzle.com

Knowing that I still had a friend, even though I've ruined my life, is a bless.

be with them is a gift, a precious and valuable one.
Will it last forever or not, isn't the main point. The hard time will gone and the happy memories will remain.   

A Never Comes Man

There was one time, the only time when I really want to spin the sandglass clock and turn the future to the past and so on.

It was the time when I saw your wet face in the middle of rainy day that afternoon.

It was the time when all the little and simple things feels like a heaven to me.

It was the time when the only thing I want to last even when this world torn apart is you.

Where are you now?

Live happily? Live your life to the fullest? Healthy as always?

Already tie the knot with someone?

That rainy day ten years ago, we standing side by side in the small yet warm  telephone box. You dont know me, but I know you very well. I am only thirteen at that time, but my head feels like seventeen. 

I have the courage to say 'I like you' only at the mirror in my bathroom. 

All words flew away when your existence become so close to me like that unforgettable afternoon. Im not able to twist my tongue and spoke that words to you. I let those chances gone with the wind.

But then, that memories is my precious little memories.

Even though you never come to me at the end, but thats makes it a more precious memories to me. 

You, who I cant reach even though I have spread my two arms widely.

You, who always wears your glasses in such a handsome way.

You, who always sees a wrong girl in a wrong time.

You, who never ever come to my hands. Never.    

Home

What is home?
I wonder ..

I have a house as big as a palace

But I wonder is it my home?

I have a boyfriend who always ditch me when he's happy and run to me when he feels sorry

But I wonder is that a place my heart has to come home?

I have a friend as much as the water in the sea who invite me to their party but never share their secrets with me

I wonder is them a place where my secret can landed home safely?

What is home?

Home for everything and everybody.

What is it?

A Little Mistery

http://fc09.deviantart.net

Those red shoes belongs to the girl with black long hair.

I remember it clearly like it was yesterday.

This girl came to me in the morning, she tried to escape from something. It was a cold and spooky morning where everything so white and silent.

War is over but some soldier still messed around with some ladies in our town.

At first, I thought that girl ran away from soldiers pursue, so I welcome her with open heart and mind.


I didnt think twice and let her stay a night with me. She had a long slender body and a small yet chubby face like a doll. Her cheek blushed in pink and her eyes looks like a starlight, it sparkle so much till I have to hold my breath.

This girl ran away the next morning. She only left her red shoes. That red color still terrifies me.

Why?

The night before that girl came to me, the general's daughter who lives two blocks from me was found death near the park.

Her red shoes is the only thing thats gone.

Howling

Cant see how much of a wolf howl into the dark and lonely night. Cant see how desperate he is to scream at the top of his lungs to empty air. How much of it?

Please tell me.

I want to know it.  

Pit of Desperation

I know we'll fall into the pit of darkness

I know how hard it is to hold on to something so fragile like we have all this time

We try to be okay but all thats left from masking the truth is another suffer and lost

We knew how much we have to pay for being together

We knew we will never be in peace unless we die

As long as we live we will never found it

You know it as well as I do

Why we were so stubborn as to patch things together just to make everythings right?

We knew there will never be something right happened after all thats past

Why dont we start believing the truth and not try to runaway from it?

I know that by doing this,

I am the one who will cry and hurt more

I know by decide to be with you,

I will face the only truth I've been denied

The truth that I love you. Im so into you. 

Im so unbelievably fallin' love with you and thats the last thing in earth I want to realize. 

Just tell me we'll be okay like this. Just tell me that Im not making the same mistake every minute and every second like I have in the past. Just whisper it to me very slowly until I cant feel anything except your heavy and warm breath. 

I know I've been in this hell-out circle for too long. I've been breathed this poisoning air far too much, keep it in my heart far too deep and abandoned it in my mind far too long. This feelings become an illness. I know thats what happened to you too. We both sick with each other and ourselves but still can't let go what we haven't been started. 

I know theres no future.

I know it for a long time.

I just want everybody to know that this what loves do to you.

Just stupid awful and horrible things.

Little Prince

kachlynda.wordpress.com

If you are a little guy with handsome preference, people start calling you "little prince".
You're not a prince at all. You're just a guy with lucky fate.

If you are a wealthy woman with noble and aristocratic face, people start calling you "grand dame".
You're not a dame at all. You're just a woman with smart trick.

If you are a kind man with knowledge and golden heart, people start calling you "saint man".
You're not a saint at all. You're just a sinner who knows when the right time to stop.


There's no nice person or the bad one.

We all have it. Clearly.
    

Birthday

What kind of birthday I want today?

A quiet birthday.

No party. No flowers. No gift.

Just me and myself.

Just me and my thought.

Just me and my heart.

Just wish me luck.

Just wish me healthy.

Just wish me better.

This year I want a silence birthday. 

'Cause silence means peacefulness. And thats all I want to ask this year for myself. 

I am the Ruler of Your Stupid World.

Im isolating myself.

I close the door to the outside world.

I live based on my own beliefs and faith. 

What I need to do next is bizarre. I have to kill everyone on my ways. Or nicer, Let them be my slave in this journey. Wouldn't that be the nicest thing I've ever done? Since I've never know compassion nor forgiveness.

Im building myself a palace.

Full of glory and joy. No one sit in the throne but me. I am the king and I am the queen. I am my own people and I am my own enemy. I have no friend nor lovers. I have kept enough hungers, Just so I can let them be my meal in the fridge. Thats what they meant for me. Hunger pleasure.

Im told that this worlds gonna fall apart.

But only laugh comes out so hard.

How can that be, When I am is my own God. Im not that stupid to ruin my own place to live. I could barely understand why they all barking about how they lost their way from God when Im here next by them. How ridiculous when they pray and the only thing they ask is God's presence. Im here, You idiot.  

I have to be honest,

I own this world. I conquered it all. 

I took it from anyone you've praying into. I took it, Straight and square.

I have you on your knees, begging. I have prosperity and dignity. You cant do nothing but abide. 

This is me. I am the King and I am the Queen. I am my own God. 

Welcome me, You idiot people. Welcome me. 

My name is "Money".